A Day in the Life of a Pirate

I got my ship the same way most pirates get theirs, "inherited" from the previous captain.  Captain Johns was a pickle of a man, craggy face full of warts, with a sour personality to match.  God rest his soul.  Only time I ever missed him was when I needed the control codes to ship.  It was a pain reinstalling the operating system, but well worth having command over the ship.  The HMS Redoubt is the finest of the line...that is, when she was built.  The Reddy, as she's called by the crew, (I once tried to get them to call it "The Ready" to signify she was always ready, but it didn't take.  Pirates, what can you say, have no sense of style.) is an over-thrusted destroyer.  She's undergone several...alterations...over the years, and not the finest work.

Originally captured as a "prize" during a successful raid of a shipyard in a back-water planet, she had already seen the measure of her years.  Sold to the lord of the system for what I'm sure was a "very good price", she was well past her prime and ready for retirement.  But starships aren't cheap, even ones that aren't capable of extra galactic travel.  So I'm sure that's why she was in the shipyard for the thirteenth time undergoing a refit and repairs when she was captured, lucky for us, unlucky for them.

Despite the condition of the hull, she's still a worthy ship.  The majority of the systems were well maintained, and the heavy equipment, such as engines, had been replaced with newer, less warn-out models.  That, however, was not good enough for the first pirate captain.  Speed is key in the life of a pirate, which is probably why you never see a pirate in a cap ship.  Sure you can hold your own in a fight, but they're slow and cumbersome, not to mention god awful expensive to maintain.  We're pirates!  Rich isn't exactly our lifestyle.  Never the less, brand new (at least for the Redoubt) engines rated for a frigate were inexpertly strapped in place of the ones actually designed for a destroyer.  She flies like hells bells, some say as fast as a scout!  But it all takes a toll on her structural integrity.

You see, it's one thing to replace an engine.  It's a whole other thing to install one in such a manner that the engine doesn't rattle the whole ship apart!  That's how the first captain was retired.  It seems his first mate didn't take a particular fancy to dying.  So, during the shakedown cruise to test the engines, he made sure the captain was given a proper shakedown of his own.  Afterward, the new captain made sure that the hull structure was given sufficient reinforcement to prevent it from completely falling apart.  All that reinforcement cost space, and space for a pirate is very important.  After all, where are you going to stash all your ill gotten booty?  A ship's got to have space, or you're not going to be very wealthy as a pirate.

It was during the search for space that the Reddy earned an uncanny ring of truth to its name.  Were it not for the forward gun, she'd be defenseless.  I'd pay real money to gut the shortsighted idiot of a captain who thought it a good idea to remove the side turrets to make more room for cargo.  Sadly, it was another captain who had the dubious honor of "inheriting" from him.  A pity he or one of his successors didn't have the foresight to correct the problem before they were "retired".  Moreover, it was this very problem consuming most of my attention now.  We had just completed a raid, and our hold was filled with ill-gotten treasure.

"Captain! Scanners are detecting two Hawk class fighters on an intercept course!" Jenny is a fine pirate.  She is a wizard at talking to the ship's detection systems, and getting them to tell her their secrets.  She's fine in body as well, and knows it.  Many men have lost time gazing at her perfect hourglass figure.  Looking is fine, but don't touch.  On a shelf in her quarters rests a prize won from the last man to try to force their attention upon her.  When asked when she'll take a partner, she simply answers "When I meet someone who is more man than I!"  In my soul, I pity such a man.  But this is not a time for such thoughts!
"Navigation, what's our time until we're out of the gravity well?"

"At least 5 minutes, Cap'n." Shanty is a stick of a man.  For some inexplicable reason of nature, absolutely nothing he wears seems to fit.  It just falls around him kind of haphazardly in layers, thus earning him the nickname of Shanty, because someone once said he looked as if he was half-assed put together like a shanty house.  And so, Shanty stuck.  Now he wears the name like a badge of honor.
"Gravitational anomaly detected along our escape vector Captain!  By the readings she's a cruiser!"
"Blast!  Helm, turn us about facing toward the incoming fighters!  Put us into a slingshot trajectory around the planet!"  I muttered an inaudible oath as the ship slowly came about.  "Engineering, give the engines all you've got!"  A chorus of "Aye's" came from the helmsman and engineering as people scrambled to follow orders.

"Gunner, coordinate your shots with the helm.  Let's try to eliminate the fighters in front of us if we can."
"Captain, I am receiving a message from the cruiser ordering us to come about and to prepare to be boarded." Reggie is a lousy comm tech.  He practically breaks the comm equipment whenever he touches the panel.  However, he's one of the best linguists in the universe.  How he ever became a pirate is a mystery of the universe.
"Not bloody likely!  Tell them they can board us, but they have to catch us first!"  In general, I really dislike clichés, but text book messages like that annoy me enough to want to do something reckless. 
"Ready the surprise package."

Looks were exchanged across the bridge.  Shanty crossed himself in an archaic gesture, the origins of which were lost to history.  The tension was so thick in the control room you could cut it with a knife. 

Normally it's ill advised to use the surprise package this close to a gravity well.  If our timing is off even a millisecond, it could be the end of the ship as the gravity well of the awaiting planet is more than eager to swallow everything.

A beam stabbed out from the ship enveloping on of the fighters.  The tactical console made a tone indicating a successful kill.  Out of the view port, kilometers in front of the ship, a fireball could just barely be seen.

"Good shot Ferret!" The gunner turned giving his characteristic gape-mouthed grin.  The lad had an infectious personality.  He seems to see the world through rose-colored lenses, and always sees things in the most optimistic light.  Many of the crew poke fun at him for it, but he seems oblivious of their attempts.  I usually step in when they start to get a little too energetic in their entertainment.  Were he not a fourth generation pirate, I'd have no clue how he came to be aboard the Reddy.
"Fighter launch detected, Captain."

"So it would seem our foe is getting serious.  What's the status on the surprise package?"

"She's charged at 45 percent, Captain!" can the response from the ships engineer.  Mr. Irish has no formal education in engineering, but everything he touches seems to run better when in his presence.  He has a natural way with machines, so much so that his jerry rigs are often better than professional shipyard repairs.  I'm quite certain that the Reddy would be space salvage by now were it not for his ministrations.
"Let me know when it reaches 85."

Just then the ship shuddered from the impact of a missile strike. "No damage, Captain. It was deflected off the hull plating." Ferret dutifully reported.  "It came from the remaining fighter."

I nodded to his report as I was looking at the ship's status board.  One light flickered back and forth from red to yellow, but it was a minor sub system, nothing of immediate concern. "See what you can do about him."  Glancing over at the scanner station, I could see the enclosing blips of the swarm of fighters to our rear.  This was going to be close!

Another tell-tale sounded off along with a corresponding "Whoop!" from Ferret signifying another kill.  A look out the view-port confirmed the fireball that was all too visible against the ever growing silhouette of the planet rushing to greet us.
"That should buy us some time.  Good job kid.  You get a round on me tonight, if we make it out of this."

 His grin was sobered by the reminder that we weren't out of this yet.  The greatest danger to the ship still lies ahead.

At that moment, a groan from the ship brought that point clear as increasing gravity pulled at the ship's hull while simultaneously maneuvering ever closer to the planet.  We were getting close to the point of no return.  Soon the force of inertia of the ship will join forces with the pull of gravity to sling shot us around the planet into a safe escape trajectory...if we manage to stay in one piece and not become a victim of our own surprise package.
"85 percent, Captain!"

"Acknowledged."  Just then the status board lights started flickering one by one as the ship groaned loudly.  The hull stress from the slingshot maneuver was intense as the ship was reaching the limits of its structural integrity.  "Increase power to the hull plating polarizers!"
"I'll have to divert power from the engines, Captain."
"It doesn't matter if we're all dead.  We need to reinforce our structural integrity, Irish!  Just do what you have to keep her together!"
"Aye." Irish signed of muttering something unintelligible.
"Captain, we're coming up on the parabolic pivot point."
"Thanks, Shanty.  Engineering, release Big Bertha."

A sudden violent shudder tore through the ship.  The metal of Reddy's hull screamed as if in agony.
"Structural integrity failing Captain!"
"Captain, the ship's weapon system is down!  It's gone sir!  The main cannon has completely torn away from the ship!"

I muttered a curse.  "Thanks Ferret.  Does anyone have any good news?"
"Captain, structural integrity is beginning to normalize.  Apparently the loss of the mass of the main gun has helped reduced the stress on the hull."
"I asked for good news, Irish.  At best, that's neutral."
"Fighters from the cruiser are coming into range Captain!" Jenny called out.
"Does anyone aboard this ship know the definition of 'good'?" Without our main gun, and no way to turn around, our situation was beginning to look bleak.  We needed a break and fast!
"Helm, push us deeper into the planet.  Try to skim the atmosphere.  Hopefully that'll make it harder for the fighters to target us if they are being buffeted by the air."

I didn't dare look into the eyes of anyone.  I already knew the look.  If this doesn't work, then we're all dead, and it will be my fault.  But if I do nothing, we're equally dead.  I only have the options of desperation left to me, and I held on to them like a babe holds on to its mother's breast, for comfort.
"Two down, Captain!  The rest are breaking off!"  Jenny roared triumphantly.
"Finally some good news!  What's our status?"
"We're clearing the atmosphere on an accelerated escape trajectory. The cruiser is in pursuit and is now pulling around the planet behind us."
"Irish, why hasn't our surprise package been delivered?"
"I don't know, Captain.  It could be..."  Just then Irish was cut off by a massive EMP burst.  Big Bertha had finally been delivered.  Sparks shot across the bridge as consoles shorted out.  The lights across the ship began to dim.

"Irish, what's the status"  But I only received static.  "Irish!  ...OK, what's the status people?  What have we got that's working?"
"The engines appear to still be online, Captain, and I still have maneuvering.  However, the stellar drive is completely burned out.  We're not leaving this system any time soon."
"Well, that's something, Shanty.  What's the status of the cruiser?"
"My range is limited, however, it would appear that she took a direct hit from the blast.  She's drifting on a course away from the planet."

"Well, mates, we won't survive for long running in the condition we're in.  Without at least a stellar drive, we're essentially a sitting duck.  They can keep calling in reinforcements until there is no place left to hide."  My crew always did know me for my bent toward the crazy.  They were already prepared for what I had next to say, "They said 'Prepare to be boarded'.  Let's give them their wish.  Set an intercept course for the cruiser.  All hands, prepare for boarding.  Me lads, the Reddy is as good as finished.  We either take that ship, or we die trying!"

I received a hearty, blood-thirsty chorus of "Aye's".

To be continued...